By Thought Alone.

Have you ever realized that you hindered something from happening, by thought alone? You think, I don't want that to happen...and then it doesn't. What if you were wrong? What if it was supposed to happen? Do you understand how guilty you would feel? I do.
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How did I ever fall out of love with you, when I knew all along that we were meant to be? and that you were the absolute best for me?
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Every wrong choice affects me later. Who would have known? I hate to admit it's all my fault.

You're gona be the one that saves me.

I just realized that I seriously want to feel protected and comforted. Those aren't exactly the right words...hmmm let me think. Basically this is why I hate feeling taller than most guys. Yes, I want to be swept off my feet...but how the heck are you supposed to do that when I'm so tall? Maybe it's all in my head...I doubt most people think...GOSH that blonde giant is so huge. But I feel huge. often.

I want to feel protected. I'm tired of being the protector.
I want to be saved. I'm tired of being a savior.
I want to have to look up to you. I'm tired of being looked up to.

"I said maybe, you're gona be the one that saves me. And Afterall, you're my wonderwall."

How Addicted.

You call me up and I'm there.
How addicted am I?
I sacrifice for you and you think I'm just being "motherly."
How addicted am I?
I listen to your complaints.
How addicted am I?
I tell you what you wana hear.
How addicted am I?
I stick around just cuz you're there.
How addicted am I?

It's cuz you're something different.
But you're all the same.

Silly Crap.

Prom. Prom. Prom. I can't wait!! But I'm dreading this process!! It would be so much easier if I didn't have to do that asking.

Gosh I have so many issues.

I'm biting my nails again...which can only mean one thing...THE WORLD IS ENDING!! The end of the world is not what I need right now. I would like to figure things out before then. arggggh.

Wonderful Now.

I close my eyes when I get too sad
I think thoughts that I know are bad
Close my eyes and I count to ten
Hope it's over when I open them

I want the things that I had before
Like a Star Wars poster on my bedroom door
I wish I could count to ten
Make everything be wonderful again

Hope my mom and I hope my dad
Will figure out why they get so mad
Hear them scream, I hear them fight
They say bad words that make me wanna cry

Close my eyes when I go to bed
And I dream of angels who make me smile
I feel better when I hear them say
Everything will be wonderful someday

Promises mean everything when you're little
And the world's so big
I just don't understand how
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
Tell me everything is wonderful now

Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now

I go to school and I run and play
I tell the kids that it's all okay
I laugh aloud so my friends won't know
When the bell rings I just don't wanna go home

Go to my room and I close my eyes
I make believe that I have a new life
I don't believe you when you say
Everything will be wonderful someday

Promises mean everything when you're little
And the world is so big
I just don't understand how
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
When you tell me everything is wonderful now

No
No, I don't wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now
No
No, I don't wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now

I don't wanna hear you say
That I will understand someday
No, no, no, no
I don't wanna hear you say
You both have grown in a different way
No, no, no, no
I don't wanna meet your friends
And I don't wanna start over again
I just want my life to be the same
Just like it used to be
Some days I hate everything
I hate everything
Everyone and everything
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now...

I don't wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now

-Everclear

Love Just Is.

Love.

Desperate Love.
Simple Love.
Friendly Love.
Passionate Love.
Eternal Love.
Anxious Love.
Romantic Love.
Forced Love.
Puppy Love.
Needy Love.

I've given. I've taken.

Don't know what to think.

What the heck happened to what I used to be? wow.