It's kind of like screaming while you fly down the sledding hill.
It's kind of like waking up with a new life.
It's kind of like winning when you don't deserve a second chance.
It's kind of like the comfort of Christmas lights still up in January.

It's kind of like a breath of fresh air on the coldest of nights.

Why She Cried II

Why she cried on the drive home she couldn't quite say.
Maybe it had something to do with the fact that she was alone...maybe not literally. She was loved, to an extend she could not comprehend.

But love was a feeling she despised so pointedly this evening. It was a lost cause, she had decided.

These tears felt familiar. Like a comfort in her moment of desperate longing.

Or at least it brought back feelings of a Christmas, not yet a year past, but ages ago in the steps of her heart.

When she tried to be so strong. Few had ever heard her shed such crushing tears as she did that Christmas Eve...or cry till she shook.

Maybe it was because she knew she'd lost home. And she almost wished there was somewhere for her soul to rest.
Maybe it was because she still hasn't been able to find God, or maybe it was that she was running. Running from him.
Maybe she knew she let go something she never wanted to lose. Things always reached this point of absurdity.
Maybe she couldn't understand how he could love her. Nothing has ever felt so terrifying, so something must be real.
Maybe because her life was never an open book, and she insisted on keeping silent.
Or maybe, she's just tired of falling.

What she did know was that it hurt like hell to leave his arms where she felt safe, warm, and protected. To whom does she belong?

Tonight I feel all dolled -up & lonely.
I'm craving my comfy spot next to you,
snuggled under a blanket
with the quiet din of the movie channel in the background.
I could do without this headache & this heartache.

The Sweetest Kind of Like.

9-30-09 He asked me to be his girl. <3

That's cool. I guess.

You'd said we'd be okay.
Fuck that.
That was fucked up,
and it hasn't left us okay.

You haven't messed with my heart,
you've fucked up my soul.

Is Our Story Over?

She was not perfect enough to be irresistible,

not flawed enough to be considered.

Jane Austen Quotes

Business, you know, may bring you money, but friendship hardly ever does.

Friendship is certainly the finest balm for the pangs of disappointed love.

I have been a selfish being all my life, in practice, though not in principle.

Selfishness must always be forgiven you know, because there is no hope of a cure.

My sore throats are always worse than anyone's.

Nobody minds having what is too good for them.

One does not love a place the less for having suffered in it,
unless it has been all suffering, nothing but suffering.

The more I know of the world, the more I am convinced
that I shall never see a man whom I can really love.

There is something so amiable in the prejudices of a young mind,
that one is sorry to see them give way to the reception of more general opinions.

They are much to be pitied who have not been given a taste for nature early in life.

We have all a better guide in ourselves, if we would attend to it,
than any other person can be.

What is right to be done cannot be done too soon.